I find walking through the woods to be a good spiritual practice. Being alone with nature is a good way for me to tell God what's on my mind. Occasionally I hear back from God.
This happened last week. I took a walk through the local bike trail in town and decided it was a good time to talk to God about my mental health issues. I don't want to get into the details, but I had a horrible depressive spell last week. Out of that experience, though, I finally decided to get serious about my never-ending cycles of ups and downs. But I was still a little disappointed that God, I felt, wasn't doing enough for my mental health. So during my walk, I told God that I wish God would do more for my mental health.
And, God spoke back.
It wasn't like a burning bush or an audible voice. When I say that God "spoke" to me, what I really mean is that I get a gut feeling out of nowhere that makes sense out of all the crazy questions, thoughts, and doubts in my head.
When God spoke to me last week, God said, "I was waiting for you to take your mental health seriously."
Advent is in a couple of weeks; the time of waiting for the light to pierce through the darkness. During Advent, we hear so much about us waiting upon the Lord, but I like to think that sometimes, just sometimes, God waits for us. God waits for us to finally say, "Enough is enough! I can't do this without You! Please help me!"
And sometimes it takes me a really long time to get to that point.Sometimes I don't want to admit that I'm helpless without God. But God's patient.