I don't know if other bloggers go through this, but I think there comes a time in every blogger's life that they want to use their blog to completely tear some one apart.
Let's face it, that's what gets the most attention. Go to any political blog and it's all "Look what this dumb person wrote. Look what this idiot did." It's easy to get caught up in that stuff, and recently I got the smack talking itch. At first I wanted to write about a very popular 20-Something Blogger (whose name I want say, but I will say that she "hates so much"), but then I decided not to do it. As Ephesians 4:29 says, "Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what his helpful for building others up, according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen." So the smack talking urge died down.
That is, until this week while I was reading You-Know-Who's blog. Oh boy, here's my chance!
The first one I wrote about Miss Blogging Lady, the one about George Tiller, wasn't too bad. It was critical, but didn't stoop too low. Then came today's post. Now here's where I get to name-calling. First I referred to her "just another neocon who worships at the altar of Rush Limbaugh." But after Miss Blogging Lady explained on her Twitter that she's not a neocon (neoconservatives support the welfare system), I did an Andrew Sullivan number and claimed she was a Christianist. Felt pretty good, too.
And then it hit me. Have I gone too far?
James 3:10 tells us, "Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers, this should not be." How true that is! In fact, sometimes praise and a curse comes out in the same sentence. "You know that Miss So-And-So, bless her heart, she's as dumb as a brick." Come on, don't act like you've never done that before!
But seriously, sometimes I go too far with my words and don't even realize it. It's only when all my friends say, "Dude, not cool!" that I realize I went too far.
So let me ask you all this (especially my Christian blogger peers)--how do you keep a close watch over your tongue? How do you remind yourself to use your words for building people up instead of tearing them down? I'm all ears, folks, 'cause I need all the help I can get!
*UPDATE 01/06/10: Okay, so "neocon" and "Christianist" aren't worst things you can say about someone. I know that. My point was that I was starting to drift into that mud-slinging low-level.
*UPDATE #2: I just took the "La Shawn Gets Schooled" post down.
writing again
4 weeks ago
I'm not a blogger, but my Grandmother used to exhort us to follow the old adage..."If you can't say anything nice, you shouldn't say anything at all." I've gotten along with my peers best when I've tried to walk that path.
ReplyDeleteSimple enough. Ever notice it's always the simple think you forget?
ReplyDeleteTypo: that last comment should read simple "things."
ReplyDeleteMost of my blog posts sit for a bit before they are actually published. I find that my passion/snarkiness mellows a bit over the period of a few hours.
ReplyDeleteI tend to type up a rough draft while the muse is on me, then let it sit. In a few hours I rework it a bit (maybe more than a bit) then finally set it free. That tends to weed out the passionate but unkind thoughts and words (and helps locate errors, typos, gaps in logic, etc.). If I sense that it is really too snarky, it may never get published.
I find that my age/experience/wisdom? helps as well. I've been around long enough to have lived through more than enough times of 'open mouth insert foot'. Sometimes those experiences have taught me something.
There is also something to be said about the 'still small voice' inside that quietly says: "Are you sure you should say that?" That voice is easy to override, but experience says: "Better listen, boy!"
I can be more volatile when commenting on posts. I take less time, and don't tend to let them sit for any length of time before hitting 'post comment'.
Another thought came to mind after posting my previous comments.
ReplyDeleteHow do you think the OT prophets felt when they said some of the things they did? It's as if they had to override whatever sense of propriety or decency they had in order to come across as strongly as God wanted them to. I think sometimes things just need to be said.
That might not be so in a specific, personal attack, but in a more general, systemic diatribe.
So, just don't name names!!
I'll have to remember that, Al. Thanks!
ReplyDeleteI actually heard about your vent from another nameless source before you wrote about it (and let's just say you left a sour taste in a few un-Christians mouths)...just remember that unlike spoken words, which can be forgotten over time, Web words are remembered forever. You tend to get easily worked up, so holding your breath before you post is a good idea--especially if you intend to say something that makes people perceive Christians in a negative way. And while I'm being completely honest, your writing is much stronger when you are not writing in attack style.
ReplyDeleteI have to say something on this because you wanted to know how other bloggers keep their mouths shut. I think of it this way- why is my opinion so important to them? I've had personal attacks on me from other bloggers and the only thing going on in my head was wondering why they cared so much. Unless you are defending yourself, there is no need to talk about them. I know it's the internet but honestly, it just comes off insecure and like a person has nothing better to do than to spew unwelcomed opinions on personal character. IMHO. I'm coming from both sides of the spectrum also.
ReplyDeleteScott--You're right, I do get too easily worked up. If I was smart, I'd just stay away from websites and people that rile me up, like Barber, Malkin, Hannity, etc.
ReplyDeleteIt is a hard thing to do... control the tongue. As you know, James 3:1-18, is our guide. In fact the whole book of James can be, dare I say, hard to swallow. It challenges us to live at a higher standard. But also in the words of Jesus" Let him who is without sin among you be the first to throw a stone at her" or him in this case.:) I know I've eaten a lot of crow over my 42 years.
ReplyDelete