Should Rick Warren Condemn Uganda Legislation?

I usually like Rick Warren. I applaud his efforts to fight global poverty and AIDS. I even thought it was great that he prayed at Obama's inauguration. Unfortunately, the Saddleback Church pastor isn't without some controversy.

Currently it's about his one-time association with Uganda pastor Martin Ssempa. Ssempa, in case you didn't know, supports a proposed legislation in Uganda that could make homosexuality punishable by either imprisonment or death. While Warren severed ties with Ssempa in 2007, he has not publicly denounced the bill. Yesterday on Meet the Press, Warren said, "As a pastor, my job is to encourage, to support. I never take sides." He also recently told Newsweek, "The fundamental dignity of every person, our right to be free, and the freedom to make moral choices are gifts endowed by God, our creator. However, it is not my personal calling as a pastor in America to comment or interfere in the political process of other nations."

I agree that Warren's primary job as a pastor is to preach the Word of God, not comment on world politics. When preachers talk too much about politics, they make it sound like God has a specific political agenda [Not to say that I don't believe the Gospel has some social aspects to it, but that's another story]. Plus, Warren did distance himself from Ssempa, claiming that Ssempa's views did not represent either Saddleback Church or Warren's PEACE Plan.

However, this issue goes beyond mere politics. According to Amnesty International, the bill includes provisions that would "forbid the "promotion of homosexuality" – including publishing information or providing funds, premises for activities, or other resources. Conviction could result in up to seven years in prison." Under the same bill, anyone could be imprisoned for not reporting anyone who is gay within 24 hours.

"Under Uganda's existing laws," Amnesty International further reports, "the police arbitrarily arrest and detain men and women accused of engaging in consensual sex with someone of the same sex. Human rights organizations have documented cases of torture or other ill-treatment against lesbians and gay men in detention because of their sexual orientation."

I know Warren publicly supported Proposition 8, but this bill is about more than just whether or not gays should marry. If he publicly condemned the bill, he would be speaking up for basic human rights, which transcends mere politics.

What do you think? Should Warren publicly condemn Uganda's legislation? Or was it wise for him not to comment? Discuss.

Blog Name and RSS Feed News

I've decided to go back to the name "The Boy with the Thorn in His Side."

The URL is still the same: travismamone.blogspot.com.

However the RSS Feed is now this: http://feeds.feedburner.com/BoyThornSide

Please update your Google Readers.

Thank you.

Stuff You Should Check Out: 11/27/09

Hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving (or, if you live outside of the United States, and happy November 26th). Here are some stories that caught my eye this week:

-First, in Shameless Self-Promotion, my "Praying for Obama's Demise" article is now on Burnside Writer's Collective. The article has started quite an interesting conversation.

-Cracked.com finally says what we've been thinking: Facebook I.Q. tests are stupid.

-Kirk Cameron and a college student debate evolution. Despite the bad audio quality, it's actually a very good discussion. (Although between you and me, I think there are bigger fish for Kirk to fry than whether or not little Johnny should learn about evolution. Stuff like, I don't know . . . poverty.)

-Richard Rushfield at Gawker confirms what we already kind of knew: Avatar is probably going to suck.

-And finally, this week on Disturbed Christians I take a look at the post-Thanksgiving tradition known as Black Friday.

Thankful

Since I'm a huge Derek Webb fan, and today is Thanksgiving, I thought it would only be fitting to post this video:



Happy Thanksgiving!

Praying for Obama's Demise?

January 20, 2009 was a day that I’ll always remember. We brought up a TV so everyone—from the library patrons to the staff—could watch the inauguration of Barack Obama. Despite a heated and sometimes vicious election season, we watched the inauguration not as Democrats and Republicans, but as Americans. We even sang the National Anthem together. In that moment, we realized that we were truly One Nation.

I’m not sure what happened since then, but the current political tension is thicker than the election season. What started as mere criticisms of Obama’s policies have transformed into vicious attacks and slanders. The President has been accused of promoting socialism, not being a U.S. citizen, and setting up “death panels.” The backlash against Obama has transcended beyond basic Democrat-bashing; some are even praying for his demise.

No doubt you have seen a new crop of t-shirts and bumper stickers that say, “Pray for Obama—Psalm 109:8.” At first it seems innocent enough; the Bible does tell us to pray for our leaders. However, if you look up Psalm 109:8, you’ll realize it’s not as innocent as it seems: “May his days be few; may another take his place of leadership.”

What makes it even scarier is what follows that particular verse: “May his children be fatherless, and his wife be a widow. May his children be wandering beggars; may they be driven from their ruined homes” (v. 9-10). Although the “Pray for Obama” slogan does not include those verses, if you take Psalm 109 in its entirety, it makes it sound like a prayer for the President’s death.

You might ask how this is different from the bumper stickers that said, “Send Bush back to Texas.” While the backlash against the former president was also huge, and sometimes got a bit ugly, I don’t remember God being brought into the mix. I might be wrong, but I don’t recall anyone praying for Bush’s demise or death. With the “Psalm 109:8” slogan, Obama’s critics are once again reiterating the false notion that God, in His infinite mercy and justice, is some how politically partisan.

According to Scripture, “there is no authority except that which God has established” (Romans 13:1). The Bible also tells us to pray for “all those in authority, that we may live peaceful and quiet lives in all godliness and holiness” (1 Timothy 2:1-2). That’s not to say that civil disobedience isn’t sometimes necessary (see Daniel 3:1-11 and Acts 5:28-30). But regardless of who is in the White House, he is still our president, and still needs God’s guidance.

While there is nothing wrong with not liking either Obama or his policies, praying for his demise is taking it way too far. Instead, we should pray that God gives our president the wisdom and strength to lead our nation. God is not politically partisan, and neither should be our prayers.

Need Some Technological Help

Stuff You Should Check Out: 11/20/09

Here we are at the end of another work week, which means it's time to take a look at what's been going on this week:

-The book Deadly Vipers was pulled from stores by its publisher, Zondervan. The book stirred stirred up a bit of controversy over its marketing, which many believe reinstated many Asian stereotypes.

-Jim Wallis proposes an alternative to President Obama's current Afghanistan policy.

-Diana Butler Bass examines the Pray for Obama, Pslam 109:8 bumper sticker.

-McSweeney's has a new column written by high schooler Caroline Lazar called Oh My Gawd: A Column about a Teenager Navigating Religion. Great stuff!

-Arianna Huffington and Keith Olbermann discuss the "fearmonger-in-chief" Glenn Beck. Pretty much sums up why I can't stand Beck.

-And finally, my article The Thorn in the Flesh was published this past week on Relevant Magazine's website.

Open Letter to Joe Albero

Dear Joe,

I congratulate you for the success of Salisbury News. In this day and age, I think it's important for the blogosphere to catch the stories that occasionally slip through the established press' fingers. However, there is an alarming trend on your blog that I want to point out.

First let me make it clear that while I did vote for Barack Obama last year, I don't think that he's some sacred cow that no one can touch. Questioning and fact checking your leaders--whether they are Democrats or Republicans--is the most patriotic thing you can do. My problem is that you print things about the President that are simply not true.

For example, recently you posted a picture of Obama not putting his hand on his heart at last week's Veteran's Day ceremony. The problem is according to FactCheck.org, that picture is him approaching the podium while "Hail to the Chief" played. And it wasn't even at the Veteran's Day ceremony either; it was at a Memorial Day observation.

Then a few weeks ago you quoted Obama as saying, "My friends, we live in the greatest nation in the history of the world. I hope you'll join with me as we try to change it." Well, according to Politifact, it's a made up quote.

And then there's the whole Obama is a Muslim baloney. Snopes.com disproved that urban myth a long time ago.

The troubling thing is I posted those links in the comment section of those blog entries, and you didn't put them up. I wasn't rude, neither did I call you names. All I did was post the links, and you deleted them.

Like I said, I'm not one of Obama's "brown shirts" who want to silence his critics. Neither am I going to devote my entire blog to hating you, like The Salisbury Grinch. It just troubles me that, as a citizen reporter, you don't check your facts. How are people supposed to trust you if you don't check your facts?

From one blogger to another,

Travis

Christmas in November?

I'm usually not a fan of The Family Circus. It's too sweet for my dark sense of humor (I prefer The Nietzsche Family Circus). However, little Jeffy (or is it Billy?) is on to something.

This past Sunday Amy and I strolled around the Annapolis mall. Crate and Barrel had only a handful of Thanksgiving items near the front, and then the rest was Christmas. Then at Spencer Gifts they already had naughty Santas and snowmen on on display. There was even a mall Santa already asking kids to sit on his lap. I asked Amy, "This is still November, right?"

When I was a kid, the days between Halloween and Thanksgiving were about getting ready for Thanksgiving. The classroom was decorated with fake leaves and pictures of pilgrims, turkeys, and Native Americans. We made lists of things we were thankful for. And yes, we did the hand-print turkeys. Christmas was too far into the future think about; we had to carve the turkey first before writing our letters to Santa.

During the past couple of years, however, I've noticed that as soon as Halloween is over, department stores start hanging up snowflakes and garland, and play Christmas music on the P.A. system. We're told to start our Christmas shopping before the Halloween night sugar buzz wears off.

Of course I can understand why, and it's not just about commercial profit. We feel all warm inside thinking about the Christmas trees, carols, and toys of our childhoods. We know that when Halloween is over, it won't be long until it's time to break out the eggnog and decorations. And really, who wants to wait for three more weeks?

So I think while part of the whole Christmas-in-November phenomenon is driven by marketing, some of it also comes from personal nostalgia. Either way, I'm just glad Starbucks' peppermint mochas are back!

Is the Prosperity Gospel Responsible for the Crash?

"DID CHRISTIANITY CAUSE THE CRASH?"

Definitely grabs your attention, doesn't it? However, the title of this month's Atlantic's cover story is a bit misleading. Writer Hanna Rosin does not blame the current economy on the teachings of either the Bible or the Church. Instead, Rosin examines how the economy might have went south with the help of a fad that many Christians denounce--the Prosperity Gospel.

The article mainly focuses on Casa del Padre, a Latino church in Charlottesville, VA, and their pastor Fernando Garay. On any given Sunday, Garay (a former loan officer) preaches that God is willing to shower true believers with great abundance. Like many other prosperity gospel preachers, he urges his congregation to aim big, regardless of their income. "If you can't afford a house you shouldn't buy it," says Garay's wife Hazael. "But if the Lord is telling you to 'take that first step and I will provide,' then you have to believe." If you don't, it's a sign of disbelief.

While Garay claims that the recession did not affect his church, many other churches aren't so lucky. According to the article, "most new prosperity-gospel churches were built along the Sun Belt, particularly in California, Florida, and Arizona--all areas that were hard-hit by the mortgage crisis." Also, at one point the article mentions that apparently Wells Fargo had the idea to send sales officers to church-sponsored "wealth-building seminars" and tell the churchgoers how they could buy new homes.

At the end of the article, there's no clear answer as to whether or not the prosperity gospel played a hand at bringing down the economy. However, I'm sure it didn't help things, either. If last year's crash taught us anything, it's that for too long we've been spending more money than we have. The pastor should be a voice of reason in a world of mixed-up values. But with these prosperity gospel churches, people are hearing the same message they would hear from Jim Cramer: buy it all now! The only difference is the prosperity gospel throws in religious guilt; if you're not prosperous, you're not a good Christian.

What do you think? Do you think the prosperity gospel had a hand to play in this mess?

The Redemption of Chris Brown

This morning before work I came across Chris Brown's new music video I Can Transform Ya. While I never was a huge Brown fan, the video reminded me of how he is a talented singer and dancer. Also, he looks like he is willing to put the past behind him and start over.

As you may remember, a few months ago I wrote a blog entry about crime and celebrity, which sparked a great conversation. At one point in my original post, I compared Michael Vick to OJ Simpson, and said that I "hope the Eagles fail this season." As a few comments pointed out, however, that Vick paid the price and did the time for his crime, while Simpson walked away scot-free (that is, until the burglary incident). As one person pointed out, "Shouldn't we forgive him and let him sink or swim based on his actions from here on?"

The conversation also reminded me that redemption is possible for all of us, celebrity or layperson. When a celebrity goofs up, I like to tear them apart limb from limb. But the truth is I'm no better than Chris Brown or Michael Vick. True, I've never put a hand on a woman, or been involved with dog fighting. But I've done plenty of things that I'm not proud of. We are all on the same boat, basically. We've all messed up and need grace. Scriptures tell us that because God has shown us grace, we should show grace to others.

Now don't think I'm suggesting we forget about what happened between Brown and Rihanna, or even condone it. But since he has served his debt to society, and, judging by the recent MTV interview, understands that what he did was wrong. So I hope that Brown can find full forgiveness, and let God be the final judge.

Stuff You Should Check Out: 11/13/09

Well, we're at the end of the week, so that means it's time to share the links and articles that got my attention.

-Scot McKnight explores how nationalism can spoil the Gospel.

-Over on Disturbed Christians I finally write about how I feel about Carrie Prejean (don't worry, it's not as brutal as you think).

-Tim LaHaye signs a new book deal and begins work on a new book series about the apocalypse. So how many ways can the world end, Timmy? (Thank you, Rachel, for the link)

-Jon Acuff of Stuff Christians Like raises $30,000 in just 18 hours to build a kindergarten in Vietnam.

-And finally, Jon Stewart starts The 11/3 Project. *sniff sniff* I'm sorry, I just love my country.

To Snark Or Not To Snark II

A couple of weeks ago I asked if snark had any place in the Christian faith. Since then one of my favorite bloggers Matthew Paul Turner has stirred up quite a bit of controversy with his brand of humor.

Last week Turner wrote a hilarious parody of Joel Osteen's latest book It's Your Time. While most of the comments agreed that Osteen was full of baloney, some wondered if Turner was being judgmental. I personally saw nothing wrong with the post, but then again I have a pretty cynical sense of humor.

However, Turner might have gone a little too far this past Sunday when he mocked John Piper. It all started Saturday when Piper wrote on his Twitter, "Is anyone really addicted to porn? Put a blow torch in their face; they will turn off the computer. IF they believe its real." In response, Turner wrote a response asking him to explain himself. Excerpt:

Now, if that Tweet had come from somebody like Glen Beck or Bill O'Reilly, most people would probably giggle and wait for the truth to get released on TMZ.com. But it's you, John--the Optimus Prime of the Christformers--TMZ.com doesn't care about you. Only America's ELECT care about you, and they are waiting for an answer. Well, some of them are waiting for an answer, the ones who have been predestined before the foundations of the earth to be waiting for an answer. They can't help that they're waiting for your answer, John. It's not their choice.

Comments were mixed. Some thought it was dead-on, while others considered it "mean-spirited" and "flippant." Turner responded to the criticism by saying, "Perhaps you're correct. There's certainly a fine line between harsh/whiny and truth. But the difference is this: Piper's often harsh/whiny statements are about God or mass amounts of people. My post is just about Piper."

Which brings us back to my original question: when are snarky comments okay? Is it alright to point out a fellow believer's baloney in a satirical manner? When does it become holier-than-thou judgment?

I ask this in light of the recent Carrie Prejean news. First, it was revealed that she made a sex tape when she was 17 for her then-boyfriend. Then last night on Larry King she accused him of asking "inappropriate" questions, and then took off her microphone. Prejean is great for giving a satirical guy like me plenty of material. However, with the controversy surrounding Turner's latest blog entries, I'm afraid I might go too far. That I might cross the line, and fall into holier-than-thou judgment.

What do you think?

Fort Hood and Prejudice

Investigators are currently trying to pinpoint what caused Major Nidal Malik Hasan to attack Fort Hood last week. Speculations include personal stress and religious extremism. So far, however, no clear motive has been singled out.

But while many still try to make sense of the shooting, the American Family Association has come with a solution: bar all Muslims from joining the U.S. military. Here is an excerpt of a recent blog entry written by AFA Director of Issues Analysis Bryan Fischer :

It it is time, I suggest, to stop the practice of allowing Muslims to serve in the U.S. military. The reason is simple: the more devout a Muslim is, the more of a threat he is to national security. Devout Muslims, who accept the teachings of the Prophet as divinely inspired, believe it is their duty to kill infidels. Yesterday's massacre is living proof. And yesterday's incident is not the first fragging incident involving a Muslim taking out his fellow U.S. soldiers. [Emphasis mine]

However, another AFA blogger, Elijah Friedman, disagrees:

We should not be at liberty to suspend our values, principles and laws simply for the sake of expediency. We must cling to those principles we hold dear, especially, in this instance, equality and justice. If we suspend our principles for a minute, we will regret it. Principles, laws, and values are not made and held to be given up whenever convenience dictates. No, we should guard and protect our principles no matter what. For without these, we are no different than anyone else, being swayed by the latest sentiments.

Indeed, many are quick to point out that Hasan's actions do not reflect all Muslims. Several Muslim leaders have condemned the massacre, and Sean Linnane of the conservative blog Frum Forum recently wrote about Muslims fighting alongside the U.S. against terrorism.

But the most surprising support comes from the family of Michael Cahill, one of the victims of the Fort Hood attack.

"You can't blanket a whole group of people. There's extremists in every religion, and there's extremists all over the world," said Cahill's daughter, Kerry, in a recent CBS News interview. "And I don't think that we can blanket a whole group of people when this man obviously was ill, I think."

A Bible verse that I quote a lot on this blog is 1 Peter 3:9--"Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing." While we need to screen for possible religious extremists in our army, barring any person from serving our country because of religion goes against the First Amendment. As Christians, instead of falsely accusing all our Muslim neighbors of being terrorists, we need to stand with them when they speak out against religious extremism. We may have different religious beliefs, but we must unite to fight evil.

Stuff You Should Check Out

I'm trying a new weekly feature called "Stuff You Should Check Out," where I list various articles that I found interesting this week. Enjoy!

-First "crunchy conservative" blogger Rod Dreher discusses how the media should look into the role religion played in yesterday's tragic Ft. Hood shooting. While Mr. Dreher does not spin this story to make it sound like all Muslims are killers (in another blog entry, he points out the many Muslims who fought and died in the U.S. Army), he does explain that the media should not ignore the role religion played. Excerpt:

When a devout Christian commits an act of violence against an abortion clinic, and does so pretty clearly in the name of his religion, it would be an act of stupidity, and possibly moral cowardice, to declare an investigation of his religious motive off-limits. And, in fact, we don't do that, even as we are, or ought to be, aware that the overwhelming majority of Christians neither commit nor endorse such acts. Similarly, it is right and proper to have a critical discussion of the role Hasan's religion played in this evil act, if only so we can identify Muslims like him in the future before they're tempted to act on their convictions.

-Here's an article from Huffington Post about the growing online church service trend. According to this article, many churches even do communion online (the viewer has to supply his/her own bread and wine). Very interesting piece.

-If you're like me, you frequent FactCheck and PolitiFact to get the real spin on current events. Today FactCheck explores the "government-run" mantra used by many opponents of health care reform.

-My friend Rachel Held Evans wrote a guest post on Scot McKnight's Jesus Creed blog about being a recovering "Bible snob."

-And finally, here is my latest Disturbed Christians post about what happens when you call out Joel Osteen.

Have a good weekend!

Trying to Find a Cure for the Pain

"Heaven knows I try to find a cure for the pain"--Jon Foreman

Remember yesterday when I talked about the real prayer of Jabez? Well, this morning I know exactly how he feels. I can't get into much, since I don't blog anonymously, but this morning I'm praying to God that I will be free from pain.

I once read that my name, Travis, means "crossing crossroads." When my parents named me that, however, no one knew it would dictate my entire life. Right now I'm at a crossroad, and I know that no matter which path I take someone isn't going to be happy. Is there a third way? Maybe, but I can't see it right now.

Why do I keep falling into these patterns of despair? When will this thorn be removed from my side? If Jesus' strength is made perfect in weakness, then why do I still feel feeble?

Kýrie, eléison. Lord, have mercy.

The Real Prayer of Jabez

Any one who knows me knows that I have a huge beef with the Prosperity Gospel. It sickens me to see the Word of God reduced to just another snake-oil self-help scam where you can get anything you want if you just "think positively." One of the most popular examples of this is The Prayer of Jabez, which misuses a small anecdote found in 1 Chronicles 4:9-11:

Jabez was more honorable than his brothers. His mother had named him Jabez, saying, "I gave birth to him in pain." Jabez cried out to the God of Israel, "Oh, that you would bless me and enlarge my territory! Let your hand be with me, and keep me from harm so that I will be free from pain." And God granted his request.

Many people interpret this as, "If you ask God to bless you, He'll shower you with material wealth and whatever else you want." But as I learned Sunday at Amy's church, that's not the case.

Did you notice verse 9 when it says Jabez got his name because his mother "gave birth to him in pain?" As the pastor explained, the name Jabez basically means "pain." Can you imagine being called "Pain" all your life? That's where verse 10 comes in, where Jabez prays that he would be "free from pain." He wasn't asking God for a life free from trouble (which is dumb, because Jesus said in this world we'll have trouble), but that He would be able to turn Jabez's curse into a blessing. And He did.

Have you ever had something bad happen to you that you could not control? Did you ever ask, "God, why did this happen to me?" In the past I've written about being bullied, growing up without a father, and struggling with anxiety/depression. But out of all that, God gave me the chance to encourage and inspire others with my story. We can't control what happens to us, but God can turn the worse situation into a positive one.

Why I Am Not Doing National Novel Writing Month

2005:

It's my first year of doing National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo), and I think that I can do it. My book is about a nihilistic teenager who kills the school's most popular girl just to see what it feels like (leftover teen angst, perhaps?). At first things are going well; the words are just flowing right out. But then, I hit a snag--I have absolutely no idea how to get from point A (the murder) to point B (the revelation that we are all evil inside). So I stop. Oh well, it's my first year, anyway. I should have better luck next year.

2006:

This time I know I can do it. This year's project is an autobiographical novel about living with a wacky family (everyone loves dysfunctional families). Since a lot of it is coming from old diaries, I shouldn't have any difficulty coming up with material.

Come mid-November, though, I burn out. The writing is terrible; it's basically, "First I did this, then I did that, and it was, like, pretty cool and stuff." Plus, I find myself re-writing the first chapter over and over again, looking for that hook that will get the reader's attention. But every time I revise it and post it on an online message board, it gets trashed. So that project goes into the trash. I might skip next year.

2007:

This year I'm not going to worry about the quality of words. I'm just going to write the first thing that comes off the top of my head. It's going to be completely disjointed and avant-garde, like Naked Lunch. Only I won't be on heroin.

My book this year is a satire of social networking sites. It's about a website that turns people into zombies.

Unfortunately, this project gets scrapped within the first week. I get bored, and I run out of ideas.

Didn't Kerouac write On the Road in three weeks? Why can't I seem to do it? Oh wait, I know why--I'm not high on speed.

2008 and 2009:

Wow, I actually write better when I'm not competing! Who'd have thunk it?

The Joys of ChristWire

Today I stumbled upon a story on the website ChristWire suggesting that The Golden Girls "turned a generation of American boys into homosexuals." Huh? Intrigued, I explored the website further and found articles about how comic books are part of communist conspiracy (check out the badly Photoshopped pictures), and how the Social Gospel is a Marxist plot.

ChristWire makes World Net Daily look like NPR!

But after some research, it may just be one big joke. Several websites say it's a satire like The Onion and LarkNews. On second look, there are several clues that ChristWire is, indeed, a parody. For example, the author of the Golden Girls article, Stepehnson Billings, says in his bio that he is "an Investigative Journalist, Motivational Children's Party Entertainer and Antique Soda Bottle Collector all in one special, blessed package!" Sounds like a joke bio, if you ask me. Also, there is an article that claims that the popular "How much are you friends worth" application on Facebook is a human trafficing plot. So it has to be a satire, right?

One can only hope.

Travis Meets the Colossal Reuben

As soon as I saw it a few weeks ago on Man Vs. Food, I knew I had to try it. Amy and I had passed Chick and Ruth's Deli several times, but it wasn't until Adam Richman scarfed down a pound and a half sandwich and a six pound milkshake that I knew we had to pop in the next time we were in Annapolis. And that time was yesterday.



I prepared myself by eating only a small sandwich for lunch, that way I'd be hungry enough for a pound and a half sandwich. I knew better than to attempt both the sandwich and the milkshake, especially since the Colossal Milkshakes come in glasses this big:



Amy tried to convince me to just get a regular sandwich, but I knew that my fate had been sealed. This was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, and I was not going to waste it. When the waiter came to take our orders, I proudly proclaimed that I wanted the Colossal Reuben with a small order of fries as an appetizer. I only nibbled on the fries because I didn't want to fill up too quickly.

And then, it came--the Colossal Reuben!



I rolled up my sleeves and dug in.



The sandwich was so big, I had to alternate between holding it with my hands and cutting it up. Either way it was delicious. Oh, was it delicious! Hot juicy corn beef. Buttery sauerkraut. Tangy Russian dressing. I scarfed down half of the sandwich with no effort, but knew I had to rest a bit before tackling the second half. After about five minutes, I was back on.

And then, just when I only had a quarter of the sandwich left, my stomach started screaming, "Enough!" I thought if I waited for a few minutes I could finish it. But it no use; the Colossal Reuben had officially defeated me.



Even though the sandwich kicked my butt, and all that corn beef and cabbage went right through me later on that night, it was worth it. The Colossal Reuben and I had put up a good fight. Now it was time for me to walk into the sunset.



So goodbye for now, Chick and Ruth's. When we meet again, I'll just get a regular corn beef and pastrami sandwich.